Subject: Having J Home Full Time Starting This Fall
With homage to Rory Gilmore, queen of the Pro/Con list
PRO:
I'll have someone to watch trash TV with: Kardashians, Project Runway, Top Chef, endless Gilmore Girls reruns
She laughs at my stupid jokes
I laugh at her stupid jokes
She will honestly tell me if my outfit sucks
We can practice our karaoke act nonstop
I can worry about her in person
CON:
Her room remains disgustingly dirty with no end in sight
She loves to bake and there are always brownies, cookies, or cupcakes around
She swipes my stuff like lens solution, mascara, conditioner, and vodka but never replaces any of it
She comes home at all hours of the night and leaves all the lights on
I can worry about her in person
At first I saw
ReplyDelete"I can worry about her in prison."
So you see, not so bad.
Short lists are a good sign. It should go well. It's the boxes I'd worry about.
ReplyDeleteMonique, that made me spit up my martini. Which I am drinking thirstily due in large part to the list above. And before she takes all of my fucking vodka.
ReplyDeleteBut the cons are nothing! 1) close the door, 2)I fail to see a problem here, 3) all easily replaceable, 4) not illegal yet, 5) you're screwed either way.
ReplyDeleteWhat I want to know is this: Does she wear your shoes? If not, I see no problem with this arrangement.
I'm caught up now on this great blog - you are hysterically funny, Cheryl. Keep 'em coming.
ReplyDelete